observation: one of the keys to having succesful relationships

Verse 2.30: O descendant of Bharata, he who dwells in the body can never be slain. Therefore you need not grieve for any living being.

Do you think that you are a keen observer? Being a huge fan of Sherlock Holmes, I always marveled as to how Holmes seemed to notice all the little things. In fact, in one story Holmes asks Watson the question, "How many times have you gone up the stairs to this apartment?." Watson replies, "Hundreds of times" and then Holmes poses a seemingly simplistic question, "How many stairs are there?" Watson can't answer and Holmes enlightens him.

The aforementioned conversation highlights an important truth that we often forget - observation is based on being intentionally attentive and conscious. It's not something that just "happens" with our eyes and ears. Only when one is focused and alert can one even hope to observe anything. In the explanation to today's verse, our exalted Gita guide and teacher, Swami Prabhupada, makes note that "The Lord now concludes the chapter of instruction on the immutable spirit soul." An excellent teacher, Prabhupada reminds the reader (who many have forgotten or gotten distracted) that for the past little while Krsna has been talking about the soul and he is now concluding his discussion on it.

This prompted me to do a little experiment of my own. For those who have read, are reading or (I hope!) will one day read the Gita, I counted how many verses Krsna has now spoken on the soul. If one counts from the first time Krsna mentions the word "soul", there are 18 including today's (starting from 2.13 and ending at 2.30). In fact, this is the first topic that Krsna talks about as soon as Arjuna asks Krsna to be his bhakti teacher.

It was an exercise that took me a grand total of 30 seconds to count how many verses there were and by doing so I learned something valuable. It's not difficult to be observant, but it takes active effort. It's a skill, which like any other, needs to be developed.

Bhakti is all about being observant. Why? Because bhakti is about relationships. In order to have successful relationships with each other, what to speak of having one with the Supreme Person, it requires that we become actively observant. Not only should we become observant of our own thoughts and actions which indirectly or directly have effects on others, but we also need to be observant of the words and actions of others. This will allow us to become more attentive to each others needs, interests and concerns.

People often helplessly say, "I don't know what you want or need!" I think that we unreasonably expect one another to communicate effectively through words. Although it would be ideal, it's hard for many persons. Living in a world that has now become saturated by communication via text, email and messaging doesn't necessarily help the matter either. We forget that non-verbal communication is just as informative. Sometimes, all we need to do is literally just look at the person really closely and observe their facial expressions, their eyes and their body posture.

The basic desire for each and every one of us is to love and be loved. So why not learn from this ancient bhakti text? The answer is simple and just requires some practice. Invest in your relationships with the Supreme and one another - strive to actively and intentionally observe. It shows that you care.

true friendship

Verse 1.24: Sañjaya said: O descendant of Bharata, having thus been addressed by Arjuna, Lord Kṛṣṇa drew up the fine chariot in the midst of the armies of both parties.

Today we get a chance to understand what true friendship is all about. Here, we see Krsna, not just God, but the Supreme Personality of Godhead, taking instructions from his good friend Arjuna.

If you think about it, it's kind of wild. How often do we see someone who is influential and powerful taking a submissive role happily and voluntarily? Mind you, this is not a paid position! It's almost unheard of these days. Instead we have the experience of seeing anyone who has or is in any position of power hanging on to it for dear life and making it known to anyone who will listen to them.

It goes to show that one who is truly powerful, as Krsna is, has no qualms about letting go of that title. Krsna is so personal. He doesn't allow qualities such as power, fame and wealth to act as stumbling blocks or barriers in his relationships with others. Krsna is not about the external, he's all about the internal.

What a wonderful person Krsna is. He genuinely cares. That's the only motivation he has for, wait for it, serving Arjuna. That's what relationships and friendships should actually be centred on - service.

But what does service really mean? We see advertisements of different companies boasting that they provide the best service and hear of royalty having servants. Is that what service is all about? Being surrounded by false indicators of service where money is a prime driver, it's easy for us to be shocked when we hear how the bhakti texts describe that our natural inclination is to serve.

And that's exactly what we see here. Krsna is taking the position of a servant for Arjuna. He is his charioteer. Make no mistake, taking on the role of a charioteer is not very prestigious and in a battle can be extremely dangerous. So why is he doing it then? Because he is showing all of us that he is the friend of one who loves him. It's not a one-sided relationship where we're tiny and he's the man in charge.

This relationship we can all re-invest in with Krsna is one of love and closeness. As we continue through the Gita, we'll get a chance to see how much Krsna loves Arjuna. Personally, I've always found the relationship of Krsna and Arjuna to bring solace to my heart. It demonstrates without a doubt that Krsna cares and he's our friend.